The psychology of anxiety
Yves Gendron Psychologist

Anxiety states range from mild worry to terror and panic.
The duration of these sensations can also vary, oscillating between a flush of anxiety and persistent anguish.

1. You need to understand that many of the sensations you experience are the result of anxiety

2. You need to know that these sensations are in no way dangerous.

What is anxiety?
Although it's very difficult to formulate a precise definition of anxiety, one that would cover all aspects (in fact, entire books have been written on the subject), everyone knows this sensation we call "anxiety". There's no one who hasn't experienced some degree of anxiety, whether it's the apprehension felt before taking an exam, or that state of alarm when you wake up in the middle of the night, certain you've heard a suspicious noise outside.

What's less well known, however, is that sensations such as extreme dizziness or vertigo; spots in front of the eyes and blurred vision; numbness and tingling; contracted, almost paralyzed muscles; and sensations of respiratory discomfort that can go as far as oppression, suffocation or choking, can also be part of anxiety. When these sensations occur and you don't understand what's going on inside you, anxiety can intensify to the point of panic, as you believe you've suddenly been struck by an illness.

The "face it or flee from it" reaction

Anxiety is a reaction to danger or threat. It's called this because all the effects it provokes are essentially aimed at either facing up to the danger, or fleeing from it to protect the body.

Anxiety mechanisms
Anxiety manifests itself through three distinct mechanisms, one of which may predominate from one individual to another.
The physical mechanism includes all physical symptoms such as dizziness, palpitations, sweating, chest pain and shortness of breath.
The behavioral mechanism encompasses concrete reactions such as walking pace, stamping feet and avoidance. During panic attacks, the physical mechanism predominates, as it is the psychosomatic symptoms that are most easily mistaken for signs of certain serious illnesses or conditions.
The mental mechanism includes genuine sensations of nervousness, anxiety and panic, as well as thoughts such as "something's wrong".

Family causes
Yves Gendron Psychologist

There's no genetic predisposition to phobia; it's a learned behavioral disorder. However, phobias often develop from the same background (anxious family models, nervous and/or physical fatigue, accumulated unmanaged stress, etc.), and a phobic can be recognized by a characteristic profile that tends to encourage the onset of a phobia:
- Repressive
- Perfectionist (no room for error)
- Hard on self
- Demanding, rigid
- Unable to say no
- Doesn't recognize limits
- Easily made to feel guilty
- Fears disappointing others
- Has deep-seated insecurities
As a result of repressing, being strict with oneself, giving all the time to others, exceeding one's limits, etc., tension builds up. In 96% of cases, this is what triggers the first panic
Family models

1- Highly critical parents
Parents who are constantly criticizing everything or who set performance standards too high can leave us feeling guilty, or in another way, that we're never good enough. In adulthood, we're always striving for perfection in an attempt to eliminate a feeling of inferiority. We may also have a strong sense of self-criticism.

2- A significant childhood loss
If you've been separated from a parent by death or divorce, you may feel abandoned. We may grow up with a sense of emptiness and insecurity, which can be intensely re-stimulated by the loss or separation of others in our adult lives.
So we may seek to overcome old feelings of abandonment by being very dependent on certain people, or by having addictions to drugs, alcohol or food. We work to reduce the pain.
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There are also children whose parents often threaten them with separation

3- Abusive parents
Physical and sexual abuse are extreme forms of depreciation. This can leave us with complex and mixed feelings, including :
- feeling inadequate
- lack of confidence
- feelings of guilt or rage

4- Alcoholic or drug-abusing parents / suicidal parents
Parents create an unstable, unpredictable atmosphere, making it difficult for the child to develop, because he or she lacks a sense of security or a safe atmosphere.
Parents deny their own problems, leading children to deny their own feelings of pain. Children often have poor "self-esteem" or personal identity.
Parents who give too much responsibility at too young an age, either because of illness, depression, alcohol or drugs... Children then become parents.
Many social phobics have experienced this situation.

5- Neglectful / unpredictable parents
Neglectful parents: Because they work too much or have other preoccupations, they don't give the child the attention or affection he or she needs.
Unpredictable parents: One says white, the other black. They often contradict each other in front of the child - there's no family stability.

6- Parents who reject
Even without physical, sexual or verbal abuse, some parents give the impression that their children are less wanted. This damaging attitude leads children to doubt themselves, or even their right to exist. The tendency is to reject oneself or sabotage what is positive.

7- Over-protective parents
Over-protective parents lead children not to trust the world around them, and not to risk being independent. They prevent them from experimenting on their own.
As adults, they feel insecure, afraid of the world around them.

8- Parents who spoil us
Children receive everything, even too much, from their parents. They know no limits. As adults, we become blasé, lack perseverance and have difficulty sustaining individual effort. We expect the world to come to us, rather than taking responsibility for creating our own lives.